little star

ok. all right. this morning, i just knew that he is the regular reader of my blog. i swear to god before this, i didn't know every single of it. someone told me that, he is reading mine since last year. OMG...here, yup maybe he would read this. or wouldn't. like i care..

as a confession page:

because of my writing, ive hurt u. extremely i did. i tore ur feeling into pieces of shit. burned up ur heart till ashes. made u feel very very terasa hati, kecik hati, makan hati..etc..all sorts of that.

i am officially declared here, i would like to apologise for my wrong...
end~

Do YOU think it is wrong to ask "WHY is everything happen the way that it is"? as for me if i never asked that question, i never would have REALIZED that GOD is the answer. so do YOU think this is wrong? if so then WHY?

okay so, i $#@&* up with him. i messed up everything, my friendship with him, all because i felt like im stronger. koya jerk.  i lost the craziest of my life because i was selling the fish aka selfish. i thought in the moment and wanted happiness and freedom. when deep down inside, i honestly do want these and be like usual. like we always be. lepak2 and talk vulgarly, no offense. i don't know what to do now, i mean i really want everything to become normal but i messed them up. poor me. i honestly do not think i deserve this chance to be with him again and the rest of us. our geng. i am doing all that i can to act cool and ignore all the pass but i don't think its working. i don't think im worth that one more chance...and that upsets me. i love our friendship to death and i never thought i would end up in a sad ending here. but now that i have, it really hits me, that i wanted this friendship last forever. remember BFF.  people say to learn from my mistakes but i want to make this one better. i feel so bad that i put him through what i have ( which is a lot). i asked his help for so many times till terhutang budi daa. but how do i fix this? i need advice, im absolutely lost and trying my best to repair my friendship. somehow, the more i try to correct thing, the more things just get screwed up even more or don’t change at all! i cant go on like this anymore. it seems from morning to night im super down and just cant get it to go away! i guess i just need to confront and talk to him! but im scare lol.

p/s i really hope, tht was not the last message i got from him.

wake me up when september ends

two seconds ago, ive read aini's blog. her new post reminds me that time flies so fast. till i couldn't realize how fast it passed. every second, every minute, every hour, every day, every month, every year...no no no..years not included here. all i know is HE IS GONNA LEAVE. well i am not think about me.i mean is he will leaving soon. go somewhere far away. living in new place, new life. back to aini..she is sobbing because her boyfriend gonna leave her in less than two months. but aini, what i wanna say here is. plz do wake up, u are not the only who suppose to be sad. u better not girl, u are still got friends surround u. yup, i know that we cannot replace his place. but at least plz give us the chance to cheer u up like him do. one important thing, at least u know that sooner or later u and him could be together. u both are couple. no need to be gloomed. i would like to thx u because remind me of this. i believe that with your love, u both would end up in happy ending. but me and him, it wont be. wont. 

breakwater

currently at see sea shoppers aka cyber cafe lol..printing emosi n math assignments...actually i just came back from kajian luar which were at pantai sabak n pantai cinta berahi..eh2, opsss...cahaya bulan lol..pics update later k..not transferring yet. haha

yesterday. when to fara's house. got open house..yup2, mkn!!! i like..

trio-groupmates

open house. pix taken by bibik jie. haha

i dont have facebook

well i tell u olls bout life without fb acc (facebook account)

first and foremost is, u are out-to-date..yes, its true. ive been in kind of situation..because of my fb has been deactivated for almost 2 months if i not mistaken, all the hot news, gossips, birthday alerts, invitation to open houses, etc..i missed them all. and depends on my friends who has willing to be my storyteller and delivered them all. then i know "laaa, yeke", "hah bilo ag neh", "xdop oyk pum ktku"..these all sorts of saying have been speak up by me. short answer, sorry, i dont have fb any more lol. dont blame me.kah3. so it clearly shows that how useful the fb is. but if we look from other side. it just nothing. fb just nothing, heyy i can life without fb ape..why not u? why need to facebooking 24 hours for the whole day? every second, every time u getting on9..sometimes i feel weird and pissed-off when someone is talking in front, we, the audience are not paying every single attention to him/her..in lecture hall mostly. i observed from back, students who sat in front, they were facebooked. but the lecturer was bla bla bla. so what was the point being there. baek ponteng jek...ops. uhhh, add-on 2 more assignments PNB & GEO!

mode: more bz lol. n sorry if xbrape terlayan msj tu..kui3 terbz la plk

ya'all

ive been quiet here because im busy doing works elsewhere. and because i have absolutely no idea what to write, here. comforting to know, no?

just came back from clinic..sending adam. he got fever..(ngengade)..but nevermind, at least ive got reward..yeay. drive-thru kfc..

snack plate so, air mountain dew k

meleleh air liur korg kn..eh xngaku lak..tu bejebok dh tu.lap la wey

deep inside, im poor

from abah

also from abah (dis phone is sicking right now, do pray for it ya)

from ma. she bought 3 bijik same model for herself, her hubby(abah aku la tu)and me-actually mine is blue in colour

from abe jue (tepon chino 2 sim)-is using now

from apih (mine is black)

latest one, also from apih (black is sexy)..klu la pink, mest lawa gilo..anyway, thankful je nseb bek org bg kn..p/s dlah ade merah, zaim ade oren and aku ade itam...pink sape la dpt agknye..huhu

the most precious harta-from abah

 

 

 

from abah as well-no more P k..ahakx

from abah too (pewnat da ni duk from abah 2x)

well, hey noorasmad!!!..those all stuffs are from someone, where is original from you???
**********

NO MONEY NO TALK maaaa (dgn muke ngengade gler)

don't leave me

i know that im not the most perfect person

as u want me to be

but, ive tried

this all happened not because of me

it was not my fault

obviously

im just a victim here-

 

please back to normal. i need u for this raya lol!! if not, no raya pics sob3..

i..i...i......errr

ok today is sucks..totally!!! woke up from bed around 11am. looked at my phone, 3 messages received..those were from fezal, zaim and boo. read all of them (muke mamai ag). then dup dap dup dap..one of them was %$@(#..what?? seriously i seemed speechless and trembling. again. scroll up and read it several. ohh ok.

what are u doin'?

is doing economic' assignment 

wink**

p/s now, at this moment

I praise Allah for sending me you my love
You found me home and sail with me
And I`m here with you
Now let me let you know
You`ve opened my heart
I was always thinking that love was wrong
But everything was changed when you came along

OOOOO

And theres a couple words I want to say

For the rest of my life
I`ll be with you
I`ll stay by your side honest and true
Till the end of my time
I`ll be loving you. loving you
For the rest of my life
Thru days and night
I`ll thank Allah for open my eyes
Now and forever I I`ll be there for you

I know that deep in my heart
I feel so blessed when I think of you
And I ask Allah to bless all we do
You`re my wife and my friend and my strength
And I pray we`re together eternally
Now I find myself so strong
Everything changed when you came along

OOOO

And theres a couple word I want to say

For the rest of my life
I`ll be with you
I`ll stay by your side honest and true
Till the end of my time
I`ll be loving you. loving you
For the rest of my life
Thru days and night
I`ll thank Allah for open my eyes
Now and forever I I`ll be there for you

I know that deep in my heart now that you`re here
Infront of me I strongly feel love
And I have no doubt
And I`m singing loud that I`ll love you eternally

For the rest of my life
I`ll be with you
I`ll stay by your side honest and true
Till the end of my time
I`ll be loving you.loving you
For the rest of my life
Thru days and night
I`ll thank Allah for open my eyes
Now and forever I I`ll be there for you

I know that deep in my heart

p/s yup, ive got ur email. thx alot. u must be strong. i know how it feels when someone we loved suddenly left us. thats what we call the cycle of life. life and death are destined. no one can change it. i hope u and ur family are in a gud health..may God bless u all.salam takziah.

jab.we.met

we met for the last

i gave him something

he gave me nothing

but the treasure is there

your sweet smile is enough for me

happy holiday yg..

selamat hari raya aidilfitri

maaf zahir n batin

p/s i know that ive hurt u in so many ways

all i can say is soorryy!